Well, hey there, you magnificent beast of a woman. If you’re reading this, you’re probably drowning in laundry, juggling school projects, and contemplating how you haven’t locked yourself in the bathroom for a five-hour escape yet (don’t worry, the idea has crossed my mind too). But let me guess—between working, parenting, and somehow keeping the house from turning into a crime scene, you’re barely squeezing in any time for yourself. Not cool, right?

Here’s the thing: As a single mom, self-love and self-care can feel like these elusive, far-off goals that belong in some shiny, Pinterest-perfect world. You know, the one where you take bubble baths with candles while reading a book that isn’t about potty training. But listen, it doesn’t have to be that complicated. And, spoiler alert: You can have a life that involves more than just managing everyone else’s needs.

So, if you’re sick of feeling like you’re being swept away by the current of life (and your kids’ never-ending demands), here are 10 tips and tricks to help you find you again, even in the chaos of single mom life. Trust me, you deserve it.

1. Get Over the Guilt (Seriously)

You know that voice inside your head that says, “You’re selfish for wanting a break”? Yeah, it’s time to ignore that annoying little thing. You are not selfish. You are human. And humans need breaks. We need time to recharge so we can show up as the best versions of ourselves for our kids, our work, and—most importantly—ourselves.

Start by silencing the guilt when you take time for yourself. Whether it’s a 10-minute break to scroll through Instagram (guilty!) or a two-hour walk by yourself, this time is essential for your sanity. Don’t feel bad about it. You’re not a robot. You’re a freaking superhero, and every superhero needs a time-out.

2. Set Boundaries Like a Boss

I know, I know—setting boundaries as a single mom can feel impossible when everyone in your life (including your kids) needs you constantly. But hear me out: You’re allowed to say “no” without feeling like you’re letting everyone down.

The key is to communicate those boundaries clearly. If you need 30 minutes after work to decompress before diving into “mom mode,” tell your kids, “I need this time to reset, and then I’ll be all yours.” They’ll survive. Trust me. It’s not neglect, it’s self-preservation. And once you start setting those boundaries, you’ll find that people (even your little ones) start respecting your time more. Hallelujah!

3. Find “Me” Time During the Quiet Moments

Single moms have a magical superpower: we can find “me” time in the most random places. I’m talking about the moments when your kid is quietly (and miraculously) playing with Legos, or when they’re napping (hallelujah). These moments don’t happen often, so you’ve got to grab them when they do.

Use these mini windows of freedom to do something just for you. Whether it’s reading a chapter of a book (not a parenting book, let’s be real), scrolling through social media guilt-free, or just sitting with a cup of coffee while it’s still hot—these pockets of time are pure gold. Even five minutes of doing nothing can feel like a mini vacation.

4. Schedule “Me” Time Like It’s a Meeting (Because It Is)

If you’ve got a million things on your plate, including a whole calendar full of kids’ appointments, work meetings, and school activities, you’ve got to schedule your time. Yes, it sounds weird at first—like, how can you schedule self-care like it’s a business call? But once you start doing it, it’s a game changer.

Whether it’s a morning run, a yoga session, or a solo coffee date (yes, that counts as self-care, don’t @ me), treat your “me” time like a non-negotiable meeting. Set a recurring reminder on your phone or pop it into your calendar. And when the time comes, treat it like an important event—because it is. You’re important, too.

5. Get Moving: Walk, Run, Dance, Whatever!

Exercise isn’t just for getting fit—it’s for your mental health. If you’ve been living on coffee and stress, it’s time to add some movement to your routine. But let’s be clear: I’m not suggesting you need to train for a marathon (unless that’s your thing, in which case, you’re a freakin’ rockstar). I’m talking about simple stuff like walking, jogging, or even dancing in your living room when the kids are busy.

Exercise releases those magical endorphins that will make you feel like a million bucks, even if you’re still wearing yoga pants that should have been retired years ago. (No judgment here, though—live your life.) Even a 15-minute walk around the block can work wonders for clearing your head and boosting your mood.

6. Meditate or Practice Mindfulness

I know, I know—meditation can seem like some mystical, unattainable thing. It feels like something for people with a lot of free time, like monks or yogis in Bali. But hear me out: meditation is for you, too.

Start with small, bite-sized chunks of mindfulness. Apps like Calm or Headspace are great for guiding you through short meditation sessions that can fit into your busy day. Even just five minutes of breathing deeply or focusing on the present can help lower your stress and bring some peace to your chaotic world. Plus, it’s a great way to escape from the constant noise (hello, kids) for a hot second.

7. Get Crafty (Or Start Any Hobby That Brings You Joy)

Hobbies. They exist! I swear, they’re real. We all remember a time when we had hobbies, right? Whether it was crafting, knitting, painting, or writing poetry about our miserable existence (just me?), having a creative outlet is so important for maintaining your sanity.

Now, I get it. When you’re juggling everything else, it’s easy to feel like you don’t have time for a hobby. But, honestly, hobbies don’t need to be huge commitments. You don’t need to craft a masterpiece to feel accomplished. Sometimes, it’s just about taking 20 minutes to paint a random picture, read a chapter of a book that isn’t about how to survive parenthood, or start knitting a scarf that’ll probably never be finished but will make you feel like a magical being just for starting it.

8. Use the Kids as an Excuse to Get Active (And Make it Fun)

Here’s a little trick: use your kids as your workout buddies. It’s a sneaky way to get active and have fun without feeling like you’re taking time away from them. Take a family walk or bike ride. Challenge them to a dance-off in the living room (they’ll love it, trust me). Not only are you getting some exercise, but you’re also bonding. Win-win.

And if they’re old enough, have them join in on your meditation or yoga sessions. Kids love it when they get to be part of something that feels “grown-up” but is still playful and fun.

9. Create a Nighttime Routine That’s Just for You

We all know bedtime is a battlefield. After the chaos of getting everyone settled down (and bribing them with promises of screen time tomorrow), it’s time to create a wind-down routine for yourself. It’s not about perfection; it’s about having a few moments where you get to relax and decompress.

Try turning off screens at least 30 minutes before bed. Instead of scrolling through your phone (let’s be real, you do this, too), try reading a book (not a parenting book, please), journaling, or soaking in a warm bath. This is your time to reset for the next day. You deserve it, mama.

10. Get Some Sleep (You Really, Really Need It)

Look, I get it—you’re a single mom, and sleep is like a mythical unicorn that never seems to appear. But you’re not doing yourself any favors by running on fumes. If you’re constantly sleep-deprived, you’re not going to be able to give your best to anyone—especially yourself.

Make sleep a priority. I’m not suggesting you start going to bed at 8 p.m. (unless that works for you, in which case, I’m jealous), but even getting a solid 6–7 hours of sleep a night can work wonders.

Final Thoughts: You Are Enough

I know this whole “self-love” thing can feel like a lot to juggle on top of everything else. But remember this: you are enough, exactly as you are. You’re not some Pinterest-perfect mom, and thank goodness for that, because let’s be real—who has time for that nonsense?

By taking small steps to care for yourself, even in the middle of your single mom madness, you’re not just surviving—you’re thriving. And that’s what matters most. You’ve got this, mama. Go ahead and love yourself a little more today. You deserve it.